Last Updated on April 2, 2021
If you don’t want to be labeled as a toxic parent, you need to avoid being a control freak with your children, period. There are many signs of controlling parenting, from meticulously planning your kid’s schedule to tracking their every move or even deciding who they can or can’t be friends with. Limiting your child’s freedom like this can have a huge negative impact on their life. Every parent wants what’s best for their children, but you can’t just hover over their heads all the time like a helicopter. You need to let them be and find a parenting style that allows you to be part of their lives while allowing them to be autonomous human beings.
Here are some of the consequences that can arise from having controlling parents:
1. Your children will feel exhausted
Overcontrolling parents usually act the way they do because they feel like they need to push their children to be more successful. To do so, they try to enroll them in all sorts of extracurricular activities. Whether it is music, sports, painting, or learning a new language, these parents feel like they provide their kids with a competitive edge. But a study in the Journal of Child and Family Studies in 2011 claims that this isn’t exactly right. Children who take part in extracurricular activities aren’t necessarily more successful, healthy, or even happy. What they might be, on the other hand, is exhausted.
2. They won’t learn from their mistakes
Like we have stated before, it’s normal to want the best for your kids. But keeping them from making mistakes will only lead to problems later in their life. If you don’t allow your child to deal with the natural consequences of their actions, they won’t be prepared for anything once they grow up. And you can’t keep being an over controlling parent in adulthood, can you? Let your child make mistakes and support them through it. Things have natural consequences, and they need to learn about those consequences on their own.
3. You might compromise their ability to be creative
Being a control freak can send a very dangerous message to your child – that the only right way to do things is your way. And even though many paths lead to the same solution, if you don’t allow your kid to find their path and force them to follow yours, they will lose their ability to be creative. Every problem has many different solutions, and there are many different ways to achieve the same result. Let your kids experiment instead of telling them how to do things. They will get there at the right time for them. And if they fail, they will take it as a lesson.